Seven Year Itch

                                                                                               I found this article http://www.pressdemocrat.com/article/20110803/WIRE/108031092 on the front page of the Press Democrat earlier this week regarding the phenomenon commonly known as the "seven year itch", meaning the trend in the United States (noted in census data) starting in the 1950's for couples to divorce after about seven years of marriage. The author notes, as has John Gottman, that the transition to parenthood is often a factor involved in these divorces (census data also shows a cluster of divorces after about 20 years of marriage, but these seem to be associated more with the "empty nest" and transition to retirement). We strongly advise new parents to read the book And Baby Makes Three: The Six-Step Plan for Preserving Marital Intimacy and Rekindling Romance After Baby Arrives by John and Julie Gottman. This book and the workshop, Bringing Baby Home (www.bbhonline.org) can be very helpful to couples making the transition to parenthood.

Mike Basta

Next Workshop: July 9th and 10th

We are currently in the process of signing up couples for our next workshop on the weekend of July 9th and 10th. We are also doing our best to get the word out to clinical social workers (like us) and marriage and family therapists that we are offering 12 continuing education units to these professionals (for an additional cost of $25) if they complete the workshop with their partner. We also offer the workshop at a discounted rate for mental health professionals. We believe that the skills and principles learned in this workshop and very helpful to couples and that mental health professionals are ideal people to pass along this knowledge. Please call if you have questions (707-758-1147 for me and 707-235-2423 for Marcia Gomez).

Michael Basta

Presentation to The Association of Family Therapists of Northern California

On January 7th, Marcia and I did a presentation on Gottman Method Couples Therapy to a group of psychotherapists in San Francisco who are part of The Association of Family Therapists of Northern California (AFTNC). It was a fun presentation for us to do and it was a real honor as AFTNC is the oldest organization of marriage and family therapists in the United States. To listen to a podcast of this presentation and other interesting presentations please click on the following link: http://archive.org/details/ThePracticeOfGottmanMethodCouplesTherapy
Mike Basta

Next workshop (for new and returning couples)

Our next workshop is scheduled for March 19th and 20th at Angela Center in Santa Rosa, CA. We have openings for this workshop and encourage all interested couples to consider attending.

We have been approached by couples who have taken the workshop from us in the past that wish to attend again. We offer discounts to returning couples. Please contact us via email at info@sonomacouplesworkshops.com or by phone (707-758-1147 or 707-235-3423) for details. We also encourage couples who have already taken our workshop in the past to consider another workshop offered by our colleagues with the Gottman Institute, Andy Greendorfer and Mirabai Wahbe, called Deepening the Gottman Method. This workshop is offered in Seattle, WA. For more information visit: http://deepeningthegottmanmethod.com.

Mike Basta interviewed by Dr. David Pittle

Recently Mike Basta was interviewed by Dr. David Pittle about Gottman Method Couples Therapy. Here is a link to his website and a podcast of the interview:

http://drdavidpittle.podbean.com/2011/01/25/the-gottman-method-michael-basta/

Valentine's Day at Safari West

Dr. John Gottman tells a story about studying at the Kinsey Institute (Indiana University) which is dedicated to the study of human sexuality. In order to help students overcome their inhibitions about talking about sex the institute showed films of every known mammal having sex (giraffes, mice, elephants, etc...). John was impressed by the practices of the porcupine. Before sex the male porcupine faces the female and soothingly rubs her face until she decides to lower her rear quills. The male would be in big trouble if he thoughtlessly started a sex act while his partner's sharp quills were raised defensively. Dr. Gottman proposes that we humans have a lot to learn from porcupines.

Last Saturday, my wife, Robynne, and I participated in an annual event at Safari West in the hills east of Santa Rosa. Safari West is a 400 acre park that is home to over 400 species of exotic animals. Once a year they host an event titled "Wild Jungle Love" in celebration of Valentine's Day. The event starts with wine and chocolate in the afternoon as a prelude to a guided tour of the facility on four wheel drive vehicles complete with enlightening and entertaining on the spot lectures about the reproductive habits of various animals. The day is then capped off with dinner and dancing in the Elephant Room, which is a showcase for some examples of the woodcraft of Safari West owner/creator, Peter Lang.

Robynne and I strongly recommend a visit to Safari West (http://www.safariwest.com/home/), and think that many couples would really like "Wild Jungle Love". By the way, we did get a glimpse of some African Porcupines, but the male seemed to lack patience and it did not look like a lucky Valentine's Day for him.

Mike Basta

Interview on radiocurious.org by Barry Vogel

Recently I had the pleasure of being interviewed in Ukiah, California by Barry Vogel on his show Radio Curious. The interview was focused on the warning signs, or research-based predictive factors, of interpersonal relationship failure based upon the work of John Gottman. The interview is available here Relationship Warning Signs. I encourage you to also check out Barry's website, www.radiocurious.org, to listen to many other interesting interviews.